“The Average Black Girl” – Powerful spoken word

This spoken word piece written and performed by Ernestine Johnson moved me to tears today. I could feel the emotion in her words, the passion in her voice and sensed the unrest in her spirit as she… Just watch it. Watch it. I keep watching it but even if you watch it once, you will…

Introvert Me

There are times when I need to switch off and focus on myself. It’s not about you. It’s nothing you’ve necessarily done. It’s not that deep. Don’t make this about you. If I love you, I love you but I love me more. I’m not going to apologise for it. I don’t need to explain…

Mental vs Physical state

I’m tired. So tired. Every night this week I have been awake past 3am, talking to somebody or being creative or both. I don’t have it in me tonight. Mental stimulation is so addictive. Once I am in my creative zone, it is hard to switch off. Sometimes I feel like my physical state can’t…

Naive?

This week I am learning so much, about others and about myself. I don’t feel betrayed or let down in any way, I just wish I had been a bit wiser about some things. You can never really claim to know everything and people will always have something to say about you, that’s life. But…

My Shiny New Website

I’ve been working on my new website. I am so excited about it. I feel like I have used 2014 to build up a portfolio of work that I can actually put on my website. Would you like a sneaky peek? Let me know what you think. http://www.annikaspalding.co.uk

My Rollercoaster Life

One of my closest friends told me recently that I have a bipolar life. Everything is both up and fabulous, or down and horrid, with no middle ground to get balance with. I don’t know a lot about bipolar, so I won’t compare my life to it but I understand what she meant. My life…

Processing

Sometimes I can’t sleep. My mind is wide awake, full of thoughts as it processes everything. Today was a bit of a struggle. My confidence in my writing was knocked and I began to doubt myself. But I thank the Universe for this experience because I know what I need to do. I’ve managed to…

Memorable Experience

It was one of those surreal moments, where I felt physically in the room but my mind and spirit were somewhere else. Warm and familiar bodies crowded around the bed, while the frail figure laying in it slept peacefully, barely breathing. If my emotions at that point were a colour, they would have been a…